Hellmaster Phibrizzo

Probably. But she'd have to know where to look.

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Mmmm. Do you think she'll come and find you someday? She'd be okay here with the monsters because she's so powerful, right?

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The monsters wouldn't stand a chance against my mother.

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[She giggles happily, and even if he can't see it, it's obvious that she's smiling widely.]

Tell me more about her!

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[She will never know how glad he is that he's not in the same room as her right now.]

She's practically a legend and it was only her own power that ever defeated her. She's even more powerful than my father.

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[Well, she won't be laughing anymore because that just sounds way too impressive.]

A legend? But - how did her own power defeat her? Did she do that on purpose?

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She got trapped by her own power in another dimension. She's alive but she can't come home without someone who can cast her spell in our normal dimension.

It's one of the hardest spells in existence.

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Oh no...

[Suddenly, so sad.]

So you can't see her until someone else casts that spell...b-but you'll learn how to do it one day, right? To save her? You're already really good at magic!

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I don't know if I can. It's really hard... Only two people can cast it. My mother, and a mean and selfish sorceress named Lina Inverse.

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...She's mean? Is that why she won't cast it and save her?

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She blew up an entire kingdom once with her magic. She's got a few scary nicknames, actually. "Dragon Spooker", "Bandit Killer" and "The Natural Enemy of All Who Live".

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She...she blew up everything?

[She sounds a bit horrified by this.]

Why is she so mean?

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Some people are just jerks, Pino. They don't need a reason.

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But...isn't that how it works? You can't be cruel without a reason, right? I've never felt an emotion without there being a reason for it, but...I guess I haven't felt them for very long, huh?

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No, some people don’t need a reason to be cruel. There are people who will kill other people because they think it’s fun to make others suffer, or because they think they’ve got the right to and don’t have to think about other people’s feelings. It’s just how some people are.

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But...wouldn't that make them more like 'monsters' than 'humans'?

[Sounding like she's actually close to crying, even if she can't, exactly.]

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pushesupglasses.livejournal.com

[ Phibrizzo will find the following invitation slipped under his apartment door, sealed in a plain, white envelope. ]

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dr_orpheus

You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.

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gtfo_mypersonalspace

Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.

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I think you must have imagined that. How much have you been drinking lately?

[Now he's just confused. Was this meant to go to him?]

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I can't say I've ever been that interested in eating a block of cheese, William.

[Seriously, what is this? He's decided he hates technology, aside from the search function at libraries.]

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gtfo_mypersonalspace

...I apologize. My NV must have picked up that texting virus. I am a fan of cheese, however. Not that it is really that important.

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dr_orpheus

Imagined what? And while I enjoy the occasional glass of wine or sherry, I don't believe I like the implications of that question.

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People can do such annoying things with technology.

[Something he's going to have to learn how to do himself one day. He'll avoid targeting select people he actually likes and otherwise thrive on the negative emotions that arise from the prank.]

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